Australian citizen decides to become a terrorist in order to avoid terrorism.

by gournalist


Australia’s security is on high alert and several arrests have been made in Brisbane and Sydney after some suspicious activity was reported.

It seems terrorism is now on our front door step and Australian citizens are now in fear for their lives and their freedom, and some have decided to take up the philosophy, ‘If You Can’t Beat Em, Join Em.’

Randy Stewart was interviewed yesterday and told The Gournalist, “I was in constant fear that someone would behead me or a member of my family. So instead of living in fear I decided to become a Muslim.”

“Ever since we took up the Islamic faith all we’ve had to put up with is the constant barrage of racial slurs, violence, and requests for us to go back to our own country. Apart from that, I guess it isn’t too bad.”

Mr Stewart also told The Gournalist that being a terrorist is not as fun as the news portrayed it.

“I thought it would be easy, but it’s not easy beheading your family members. My wife and children have strong necks, I can tell you that.”

Randy Stewart has influenced other Australian citizens to take up the Islamic faith for safety reasons.

Shortly after the interview a typical Aussie bloke beheaded Randy Stewart because he was a towel-head.

*Image courtesy of stockimages at